So!  I know you all have lots of questions for me arising from my four month absence.  Here are the answers:

1) Fine.
2) Yes.
3) Evicted.
4) Right.
5) No.
6) Sacramento.
7) Yes.
8) A little sore, but who wouldn't be?  I mean, it was a really large sausage.
9) Temping.
10) I don't know.  It sure doesn't smell like it.
11) Maybe.
12) I can't remember.
13) Yes.
14) Thursdays.
15) Only twice.
16) Twice, really.
17) Twice.
18) Twice!
19) Okay, it was three times, but technically the first time didn't count since she dropped the meat thermometer.
20) Fisher Stevens.

Okay!  On to business.

Not My Desk, for the moment, will remain un-updated.  And the moment, for the moment, will last quite a long time.  The site will remain online and intact, but I won't be writing anything new for it anytime in the foreseeable future.

Now, now, you put that katana down!  There's no need for despair, I'm starting a brand new site soon!  It'll be called Everything Once, and it'll be located at www.everythingonce.com, and it'll be starting up, well, let's say Tuesday, July 1st.  (Don't bother going there now, there's nothing there.)

Everything Once will be, basically, a journal.  A blog.  The sorta thing that absolutely everyone has these days.  Daily entries about, you know, stuff or whatever, generally still humor-based but not necessarily.  However, there will be special days, hopefully once a week or so, when I'll write an account of something new I've done for the first time ever.  I've been trying to broaden my horizons a little lately, going out and trying some unusual activities, and trying to live a more adventurous life.

Some of these escapades won't be all that thrilling (for instance, I recently went to my first professional basketball game... um, whee?), but some will be fun and unusual (such as the 'Bend a Spoon With Your Mind' class I took a couple weeks ago).  I'd like to do the full range of goofy psychic experiences (palm reading, tarot cards, auras, past lives, etc.) and some other fun stuff (trapshooting, rock climbing, getting a tattoo, and so on) and a variety of other things I've been thinking about (attending a trial, getting hypnotized, trying yoga, quitting smoking, playing paintball, taking up smoking again, participating in an open-mic event of some sort, robbing a bank, molesting a small farm animal, etc.) .  I hope to fully document a lot of these experiences, including photos and maybe interviews with the people or animals involved.

The reason it's not starting until July is that I need a little time to prepare the site.  I'm going to be using some blog software I've never used before, so I'll need to learn how it works, get a host, plan it, configure it, construct it, swear at it, rip it down and ask for help from people who know what they're doing, etc.  I also need to get back into the whole writing thing... it's been a few months since I've written anything at all, and it's harder than I remember.  So, we'll shoot for July and see what happens.

Why am I abandoning NMD?  Well, I just need a change, I guess.  I'm a bit restless, as my "career" would indicate, and I'd like to branch out a bit, and write about new things in new ways.  So, we'll see how it goes!  I'm getting excited about writing again, and if the new site turns out anything like I'm envisioning it, I think it'll be a lot of fun.  When it launches, there will be an announcement here, or you can just remember to check www.everythingonce.com sometime in July (don't go now, REALLY, there's nothing there).  And remember, Not My Desk is staying right where it is, archives intact, so you can keep telling your friends about it and keep sending me generous donations I don't in any way deserve.

See you in July!